Vegetable Homicide (Single)

by The Cool Story Bros

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What goes on behind fridge doors is savagery and many sores
The instant that the lights go out, tomatoes fight and mushrooms pout
Have you ever wondered why sometimes you hear a tiny “sigh”?
Or maybe all is re-arranged, well, trust me, friend, that much has changed

You blame the smashed zucchini on Dad, or friend, and sometimes Mom
But all your thoughts have sadly lied – what’s happening is homicide

The veggies always quarrelled, the carrots always fought
The peppers laughed as onions went out straight into the pot
The mushrooms always tried to make some peace within the fridge
But this only resulted in them falling off the ridge

The spinach always bullied anyone that wasn’t green
So everybody got to taste the dust, except the beans
Eventually, this tired war had seen too many deaths
The broccoli was wondering if they were sadly next

A truce was made between the vegetables to end the strife
But one more battle would be fought to end this thing for life
Bob, the bravest cucumber, came out when it was night
He strode with gallant steps, for it was time to win a fight
The other veggie, Raymond, was smaller than Big-Bob
But he could hold his own, being a boisterous corncob

The flag was raised by Freddy, the tiny useless beet
And almost right away, Raymond was swept right off his feet!

Bob was quick to jump upon his fallen, injured prey
But Raymond had already seen and swiftly rolled away
The veggies gasped as Raymond soared into the air with glee
And promptly hit an unsuspecting Bob right on the knee
Bob fell onto the plastic ground as spectators all fled
Because for the first time inside the fridge, a veggie bled
The greenish fluid spewed across the ground in shades of puce
Reminding all the veggies of the time they spilt the juice

Bob, shocked could not believe his tiny, tear-filled crying eyes
As Raymond too to moment to receive his battle prize
The veggies shuddered all at once as Raymond showed his might
He just was coming down to strike, when all at once a light

The unsuspecting veggies all tried their best to freeze
But simply were not ready, the human saw the peas
With heavy hearts of sorrow, the veggies all felt doomed
The human had seen far too much and with his hand, he zoomed
Inside the fridge, he saw the chives and all the carrots, few
He grabbed them, taking them to be cooked up in his hot stew

The final plan was made to end the war inside the fridge
All of the veggies found that fighting was for little kids
No matter what they did in terms of fighting everyday
They realized there was no point – they’d be cooked anyway!

A more constructive plan arrived, to live life fully side-by-side
The plan was carried with great pride
Away with veggie homicide!

credits

released December 16, 2015

Phil "Acid Fingers" Drost - guitar/vox
Dan "Modest Mouth" Kikkert - bass
Joel "Slippy Reed" Cain - drums/vox

Song by Phil Drost
Tracked at Echo-y Practice Room Studios

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about

The Cool Story Bros Three Hills, Alberta

The Cool Story Bros are a garage-blues supergroup currently dominating the local Three Hills psychedelic scene. Exploding with fames after the release of their platinum hit, "Apples In My Home," the bros have such plans for the future.

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Track Name: Vegetable Homicide (Single)
What goes on behind fridge doors is savagery and many sores
The instant that the lights go out, tomatoes fight and mushrooms pout
Have you ever wondered why sometimes you hear a tiny “sigh”?
Or maybe all is re-arranged, well, trust me, friend, that much has changed

You blame the smashed zucchini on Dad, or friend, and sometimes Mom
But all your thoughts have sadly lied – what’s happening is homicide

The veggies always quarrelled, the carrots always fought
The peppers laughed as onions went out straight into the pot
The mushrooms always tried to make some peace within the fridge
But this only resulted in them falling off the ridge

The spinach always bullied anyone that wasn’t green
So everybody got to taste the dust, except the beans
Eventually, this tired war had seen too many deaths
The broccoli was wondering if they were sadly next

A truce was made between the vegetables to end the strife
But one more battle would be fought to end this thing for life
Bob, the bravest cucumber, came out when it was night
He strode with gallant steps, for it was time to win a fight
The other veggie, Raymond, was smaller than Big-Bob
But he could hold his own, being a boisterous corncob

The flag was raised by Freddy, the tiny useless beet
And almost right away, Raymond was swept right off his feet!

Bob was quick to jump upon his fallen, injured prey
But Raymond had already seen and swiftly rolled away
The veggies gasped as Raymond soared into the air with glee
And promptly hit an unsuspecting Bob right on the knee
Bob fell onto the plastic ground as spectators all fled
Because for the first time inside the fridge, a veggie bled
The greenish fluid spewed across the ground in shades of puce
Reminding all the veggies of the time they spilt the juice

Bob, shocked could not believe his tiny, tear-filled crying eyes
As Raymond too to moment to receive his battle prize
The veggies shuddered all at once as Raymond showed his might
He just was coming down to strike, when all at once a light

The unsuspecting veggies all tried their best to freeze
But simply were not ready, the human saw the peas
With heavy hearts of sorrow, the veggies all felt doomed
The human had seen far too much and with his hand, he zoomed
Inside the fridge, he saw the chives and all the carrots, few
He grabbed them, taking them to be cooked up in his hot stew

The final plan was made to end the war inside the fridge
All of the veggies found that fighting was for little kids
No matter what they did in terms of fighting everyday
They realized there was no point – they’d be cooked anyway!

A more constructive plan arrived, to live life fully side-by-side
The plan was carried with great pride
Away with veggie homicide!